7th November 2014

Well a slightly better day than yesterday was in so much pain felt like I was just existing not living.  Pain was all over in my back and Legs and arms somewhere shooting pains others a dull continual ache.  

I know the weather has a lot to do with affecting me, gosh wish I did have the money to move to warmer climate, and of course in America they have a doctor specializing in Dercums.  

Days like that I am just existing and not living and sometimes do wonder if it could get any worse or will it get any better?  Being only 42 I should be out there working and meeting people not looked away at home just looking at four walls.  No wonder why some people say I have had enough....  It's the isolation as us humans do need some contact with other humans (even if it's just to talk about what was on TV or politics).  

Well enough for today quite tired what with being wake up at 4 - 4:30 am for the last 3 nights.  Also with very weird dreams of moving house to having a baby and living in America (maybe that's wishful thinking).